Things To Do When You Find Yourself Awake At 2:38 AM For No Good Reason

1. Catalogue mosquito bites on your legs from a few days ago, notice a few new bites, and start to think you have bedbugs again.
2. Tear apart your bed (mattress, sheets, pillowcases, comforter, the whole deal) looking for phantom bedbugs.
3. Track the stuff you will get rid of *this* time around if you do have to battle the bedbugs again.
4. See a rogue mosquito during one of your searches, remember that you have a window open, and thus try to mentally walk away from the bedbug scare.
5. Close your window and turn on the air conditioner.
6. Try to sleep. It is now 3:12 AM.
7. New mosquito bites start itching, turn on the lights, locate bendryl cream, apply.
8. Bites still itch - wail on mattress in frustration. It is now 3:41 AM.
9. Think about life a little bit. Specifically, your life.
10. Get freaked out about not taking care of yourself, physically or emotionally.
11. Talk yourself down the ladder again.
12. Still wide awake, empty the clean dishes from the dishwasher.
13. It is now 4:07AM.
14. Force yourself to think calming thoughts. Realize it's not working.
15. Wonder if drinking warm soymilk (the only kind of milk in the house) will have the same somnolent effects as warm regular milk.
16. Nope.
17. Get up to use the bathroom. You drank a lot of soymilk.
18. Since it is now 4:38 AM and you are wide awake, pack for your weekend trip to DC.
19. Assess clothing choices, repack for trip.
20. For lack of anything better to do, tweeze eyebrows.
21. Look up estimated time of sunrise on the internet. Think about taking a walk to see the sunrise. Dismiss idea.
22. Water the plants.
23. Get back into bed, and drift off to sleep at 5:17 am - 45 minutes before your alarm clock is scheduled to go off.