Wednesday morning was just about the worst day yet; I'd had to take a couple of keys off my computer to extricate the bedbug who decided that he wanted to live there, the exterminator arrived while I was in the shower with shampoo in my hair, and the mild cold I'd been harboring for a week had fully developed so that my head felt like it was stuffed with cotton. I somehow got to Penn Station and on a train bound for The Jerz, in the hopes that escaping for a few days could makes things better.
Nope.
My parents and I arrived home today to find huge white streaks all over my armoire, bookshelves and desk. The pesticides that were used before I left ate through the finish, and they are ruined. To replace everything will cost around $2000. When I realized that my furniture could not be fixed, my parents watched as I had a breakdown. I started sobbing hysterically. I finally calmed down after I had yelled 'Who lives like this? How can anyone live like this?' and my Mom quietly answered that a lot of people are in situations that are far worse than this.
A little later, while my parents were leaving, my foot started itching. I looked down and found a baby bedbug crawling on the top of my foot. If they're coming out to get me in the daytime, and after a serious extermination, there's really not a lot more that I can do.
I'm moving. This is the only solution. I will need to do this very carefully so that the bugs don't come with me. If I think about it, I realize that I am lucky to have the resources to be able to leave. All of my drama is just about stuff and things. Perhaps this is a lesson in letting go of everything that isn't absolutely necessary. Four years ago, I left The Fiance's house to move into my new apartment. On my first night there, since I had left abruptly, all I had was my newly delivered bed (thank you, 1-800-MATTRES) and a suitcase full of clothes. I remember that night as being one of the best of my life, because I didn't need anything else. I was on my own, and I was safe. I imagine that this new apartment will feel something like that, at least for a little while. I won't have my possessions with me, but I'll be able to sleep through the night.
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5 comments:
damn! i hope you send the exterminator a bill to replace your furniture, and take lots of pictures of everything that way you can take them to court when they dont pay.
I hope you get a great place and with NO BEDBUGS!
Dumbass
Been following your bedbug tales for awhile now & just wanted to congratulate you, not only for getting a new apartment, but also for facing the whole ordeal with such good humor. Clearly, your mother does have a point, however I'm surprised you waited this long to have a breakdown.
All the best to you in your new pad.
thank you to both of you! this has been quite an ordeal, but it helps to have people who are reading and sending good wishes.
Good luck; it seems to be that the only way to truly be rid of them is to find a new home. Sometimes peace of mind is worth more than everything you own, all combined. All my best - loved the NYT article.
caitlin: i agree, and i am definitely seeing that peace of mind will be valued above all else.
stretch: 'fraid so.
dumb: yeah, everyone i talk to seems to get that itchy feeling after reading about bedbugs.
thanks, all, for your support. i can't tell you how much it means right now.
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