Like, Totally

OMG!!!! You guys are like, never going to believe this. So, on Friday I went to this birthday party on the Lower East Side with DJ. And I have to say, I looked, like, totally cute. Like, super cute. So, anyway, we're at this small-ish party in this bar in this private room, and I look up from scarfing down this piece of amazing red velvet cake, and like, OMG!!!! it's MySpace Guy. Or, at least, I think it's MySpace Guy and we're at the same party!!!! Like, what the odds, right? I've had like, a super-big crush on this guy for, like, ever, ok? But I'm not sure it's him. I mean, I think it's him, but I really can't be sure because it's not like I spend time studying his pics or anything, right!?!?!? So, I'm not sure if I should go up to him because, like, what if it's not him, and that would totally suck and I'd be, like, totally embarrassed, and probably have to leave or something, or just like, hide in a corner for the rest of the night.. Plus, I was talking to this friend of DJ's who's also, like, super cute, and we've actually had a real conversation before, not just, like with MySpace Guy where he's my 'friend' and all, and, I mean, sure we message back and forth about Edward 40-hands and like, slutty Halloween costumes, and Cabbage Patch Kids, but, like, how much do I really, like, know him? I mean, I think he's my soulmate and all, but only after I get to know him a little more. So then I keep talking to DJ's friend, and MySpace Guy must have left because I didn't see him, and then it was tiime to go get hotdogs to go with the red velvet cake, but then you are never going to guess what happened?!?!?!?!? Like, I can't even believe it. MySpace Guy sent me a message asking if I was at that party. So, it was, like, so him. Out of, like the gazillion people in NYC!!!! So now I think we're like totally meant to be bf/gf. I really think we're perfect for each other. You can tell a lot from a cute boy's MySpace profile. OMG!!!!! I, like, totally need to change my pic to something waaaaaay cuter.

(This message was brought to you by the age 15.)