• Is 'string cheese' still 'string cheese' if I just shove the entire thing in my mouth?
  • I've been walking for roughly 32 years. How is it that I (on a regular basis) still manage to hit myself in the ankles with the heel of my shoe and trip?
  • Is Tasti-Delite still calorie and fat-free if I eat it with Oreo topping? Further, is that dinner?
  • Is it sufficient to get your news from US Weekly and Time Out New York?
  • Is it a bad sign to completely forget about returning a phone call from a cute boy who wants to date you?
  • Is it reasonable to believe that I can survive in my new apartment without cable or internet access since I am presumably addicted to watching bad television and writing in this blog?


The_Gator said...

mmmm string cheese! even the best of us forget how to walk and end up on our faces. i hope you are gonna share those oreos, i skipped desert. Oreos are a great dinner by the way. At least you are reading the news, i havent really read the news in a paper in 2 years. In my opinion if the guy really likes you he will understand if you forget to call him back. You have a lot on your mind and are going through tough times. If he really likes you he will understand, if not oh well! And i suggest getting a bouncy ball to play with till you get your cable and internet. When you get bored of that i suggest a nap and then after that a pouch of fun dip! Thank god for public libraries you can keep us informed using their computers i hope!


applegreen said...

Darn it! I have to go and find some oreos to eat now.

Dumber said...

You can live without cable but not the internet. You need to keep us up to date on bed bugs and how much better life is without them.


Dumber said...

The TV you can do without but not writing in your blog and reading ours will drive you nuts. Get the access or go tot he library alot.


Andrew Simone said...

"Is Tasti-Delite still calorie and fat-free if I eat it with Oreo topping? Further, is that dinner?"

Yes, but only because of the oreos

- A confirmed bachelor

Dustin said...

Good stuff. I found your site through the waiter.

sandra said...

In order:
* Yes, it's still string cheese. Clearly, it digests in a stringy sort of way...?
* Perhaps because your shoes are out to get you? (clearly not your fault)
* Absolutely, on both counts.
* Yes, it is - obviously, celebrities are the smartest people in the nation. If they weren't, why would people care so much about them?
* It's...just a sign.
* No.