I Am A Badass

Last night, after reserving precious lawn space at Bryant Park for the screening of Annie Hall, I ran over to the drug store to pick up a prescription that I had dropped off an hour beforehand.

When I arrived, I grabbed a Diet Pepsi from the cooler, and took my place at the back of the 12 person line at the pharmacy counter. I noted that the store was not air conditioned and it was already unpleasantly hot. I opened my soda and began to drink.

I waited. And waited. And rolled my eyes and tapped my foot. And waited some more. I could feel everyone in line getting more agitated by the minute.

And then, something awesome happened. A woman near the front of the line, whose prescription had apparently been 'lost', started having a meltdown. A meltdown of epic proportions. She started screaming and swearing and saying she was going to faint. At one point, she even went behind the counter and into the room where the drugs are stored so she could yell directly at the pharmacist.

As her tirade continued, the people in line started mumbling about the wait and the ineptitude. This woman's freak-out was releasing a communal freak-out of sorts.

After another 20 minutes, I reached the front of the line, where 5 people were now yelling at the staff. I got my prescription (lucky!), paid, and ducked out of the commotion. As I was walking towards the exit, I noticed the bottle of Diet Pepsi in my hand. Unpaid for Diet Pepsi.

Paying would mean waiting in line again.

And as I walked out the door without stopping at the register, I convinced myself that the soda was payment to me, owed for my time spent waiting in line. Yes, that's right. I neglected to pay for my soda. Kinda sorta on purpose.

I HATE that drug store, and although they are all over NYC, I will make every effort to avoid patronizing them again. I'm not going to name the store, but it rhymes with, um, Schmane Need.